“One day, you’re going to write something online,” she predicted. “He’s going to see it… and, because of what he reads, he’ll show up.” This happened years ago. I was already wondering if I should give up hope that he’s the one. We met through my job and connected while talking about poker. I never asked for his contact info because he’s a celebrity, but our paths crossed more than a few times under seemingly fated circumstances and, if I told you all the details, you’d most likely agree with my belief that he was interested in taking things further. For whatever reason, he didn’t. I’ve tried to let it all go, but I still wish he would show up again more often than I care to admit… and it’s not because he’s a star. I want a relationship that makes me feel the way I did around him. I’m happy with who I am, but I know that I love life most when I’m loving and being loved. Sometime after I manifested my new apartment, I began using similar tactics to bring the man of my dreams into my life. After much thought, I decided that writing this essay is the way to create my happy ending. 

The friend who told me that he would someday show up is one of the most amazing people I know. To make a long story way too short, she is the person who took me to get my first tarot reading ever. She was raised Catholic and is now a Reiki healer. She is one of my top sources of encouragement. She sometimes calls with much needed advice (that I hadn’t yet asked for but definitely needed to hear). Once, she used Reiki to prevent a repetitive motion hand injury I was developing. She has been reminding me about the power of my words for years and recently advised me to, “literally say what you want.” 

Psycho-Cybernetics and several other things I’ve read recently offer similar advice. This tarot reading for Sagittarians like me which hit YouTube as I was editing this story (skip to 29:29) echoed past conversations I had with my friend and reminded me to be specific. Asking for and meditating on the image of what I want is essentially how I manifested my new, better apartment. So far, these private practices haven’t worked on my love life the way they have for other issues. Therefore, because of the words my friend said years ago, the many other signs that have indicated that I should do this, and the guy I can’t get out of my head, I’m taking this manifestation technique to the next level. 

I hereby ask the universe to bring me him or someone better. Show me the man who will love every single part of me; who thinks I’m the most fascinating creature on the planet. Give me someone with a kind heart that is curious about how the world works, loves to travel, thinks with an open mind, and tries hard to spread peace, love, and happiness wherever he goes. Send me someone with a strong sense of purpose whose journey compliments and supports mine. Find me someone goofy who makes me laugh more often than most others. Make it someone monogamous who is in touch with his intuition, loves animals, enjoys poker, and has artistic talent(s). Bring me someone with Vitruvian balance – stability, utility, and beauty – who will inspire me and be inspired by me as we grow together, supporting and nurturing each other (body, mind, soul).

That is what I want: him or someone better. As I said, it wasn’t about who he is, it’s about how he made me feel. I thought I had met someone who could be all of the above. When he looked at me, I felt as confident and sure of my potential as an artist, writer, and poker player as I do now (after years of further development). His gaze left me wondering if he could already see the me that I planned to become. I went for my first tarot card reading a few years before I met him with questions about my love life and received information and advice about my career as a writer and artist. Before I left, I asked her again if she saw anything about love in the reading. She said I had a long way to go, but that when the time was right, I would know what to do. 

To be honest, I was very nervous to tell this story when I began typing, but as it came time to write the conclusion, I found peace. I was embarrassed to admit that I still think about someone who I almost had something with a long time ago, but by the time I finished verbalizing my desires my heart felt lighter and stronger. Whether writing this truth simply sets my heart free to see the “something better” or brings back the one that I haven’t stopped thinking about, I believe it’s what I’m meant to do. 

I think my greater purpose is to demonstrate my intuition and help show the world that such gifts do exist. Maybe that’s why things went the way they did between us. Perhaps these words will seem crazy to some, but I’m certain they hold the power to help me prove that admitting the dreams that you dream helps them to come true. Once upon a time, I wasn’t sure my personal life could inspire a novel. Now I know it can, that I already wrote a rough draft here, and that the upcoming happy ending will likely look more like a fresh start. Words are powerful, and these ones are MANifesting. Stay tuned to see who they bring. 

Click here to visit the Divine Grace Reiki website and learn more about my friend Sharon Connolly, whose advice inspired this post.

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